On Critics
A spiritual perspective on the people who challenge our beliefs in our lives.
I meditated and wrote to myself…
Our critics provide a mirror for us. A mirror to our insecurities by exploring the many ways we are all absurd. They take our cleverest ideas, our spark of genius, and laugh heartily. They serve an important function, as they reflect the polarities that also live within us. The schema of worthiness and unworthiness being one of them.
When you uphold spiritual beliefs you must live upon the painful edge between spirit and reality. You must hold together unseen, unmanifested truths and then wade into a very real and very cruel world. Of course, we all feel uncertain, insecure, and broken; we are all desperately clutching at both planes. The physical world operates on good and bad, yet the non-physical world is non-judgemental.
The critic is then a friend in this split world. The critic holds together the other side of our psyche. The part that recognizes our ridiculousness and considers that our worst fears about ourselves may in fact hold some truth. This can be a deeply soothing balm to the scourge of perfectionism.
What can truly shake us after we’ve reached rock bottom?
The critic can uphold values we act directly against or values we are trying to extend and within this tug of war, every perspective has its place. We do not know everything and we do not need to; the critic knows the other side to our arguments and just like us they are holding the fort for their specialism to ensure no knowledge is lost. Correctly viewed, the critic can promote a sense of tolerance between views. We should not seek to be the same, in fact, the total opposite is to be encouraged. We are in the process of understanding ourselves and this requires understanding each side to us to maintain the polarity of being. Challenging individuals in our lives allow us to uphold our contradictions. They free us, as we do not need to hold contradictory views, doubts, and fears within us; we can see them reflected back to us all the time through others and we can choose what to do with them accordingly.
I love to exist in the world where I see my different faces and emotions being played out by the people around me. I do not need to hold contradictions in my heart, as they exist in living beings right in front of my very eyes. They challenge and push me to greater expansion by reflecting exactly what I need from life itself; exactly what qualities I may need to acquire or extend.
This is not to say that you should always defer to a critics opinion, though you can often learn from them if you are humble enough to accept that even the most ferocious critic may be revealing something to you, even if that something confirms that you still believe what you said or valued initially.
This can be the critics greatest gift to us: allowing us to either strengthen and reinvigorate our idea of ourselves, or to edit or reform them, or both.
There is no need for homogeneity in the new world. Language can divide us to some extent and we will form new methods of communication and knowing our minds. I welcome the day I do not need to use only words or even sounds alone to be understood.
Until then, our critics and disarming voices around us can be the starting point for rebirth and transformation. A place to allow us to surrender our personalities time and time again, whilst also allowing us to hold and edit our values. To live within the polarity is the real meaning of all energies and of all things sent to try us. These dramas exist only to bring us into greater communion with our souls. Thank god for critics. Thank goodness for each other. Thank god for the perception of good and bad. Thank life itself for its many faces and yourself for your glorious imperfection.
